Why Everyone Wants to Be the Star of the Show
You’ve probably seen it on TikTok: a montage of someone sipping coffee in golden-hour lighting, walking slow-mo through a bookstore, or staring pensively out of a car window as Lana Del Rey plays in the background. The caption? “Just channeling my main character energy.”
It’s catchy, it’s cinematic—and it’s everywhere. This viral trend has made its way into our daily scrolls, our vocabulary, and maybe even our lives. But beyond the filters and soft piano music lies a bigger question: What does it really mean to be the main character? And more importantly—what is it doing to our mental health?
On the surface, it’s fun. Who doesn’t want to romanticize their life a little? Framing a walk to the grocery store like a scene in a movie can add some sparkle to an otherwise bland Tuesday. But when the lines between real life and curated content blur, we’re left wondering—is this self-love, or just self-performance?
That’s where psychology gets interesting. Behind the aesthetic lies a deeper narrative about self-esteem, narcissism, and our increasing need to feel seen. Is this trend helping us connect with ourselves, or just building more pressure to constantly be “on”? And where do mental health and emotional well-being fit into all of this?
Let’s dive into what main character energy really is—and how it can either empower or overwhelm us. Because yes, you are the main character—but not every story needs to be edited for an audience.
Learn more about taking care of your mental well-being at PsychPlus
What Is “Main Character Energy”?
Main character energy is all about treating your life like a movie—and seeing yourself as the star. It means romanticizing the small stuff: sipping coffee like you’re in a film, walking through the city like it’s your personal soundtrack is playing in the background, or narrating your life like it’s a story worth telling.
It’s not about being self-centered. It’s about putting yourself first in your own narrative—and finding meaning in everyday life.
This trend really took off after the pandemic. With so much of life feeling uncertain or stuck, people—especially Gen Z—started looking for ways to feel in control again. Turning simple moments into something special became a form of self-reclamation.
And who better to lead the charge than Gen Z? They’ve grown up with social media and know exactly how to use it to express themselves. A walk to the store becomes a mini vlog. A journal entry becomes a TikTok with music and mood lighting. It’s creative, relatable—and deeply personal.
But as this trend grows, so do the questions:
Are we connecting with ourselves—or just performing for others?
Are we building confidence—or becoming dependent on attention?
Let’s take a deeper look at how this idea ties into self-worth, narcissism, and mental health.
Healthy Self-Esteem vs. Performative Confidence
There’s a big difference between genuinely feeling good about yourself and needing others to tell you that you’re enough. And when it comes to “main character energy,” that line can get blurry.
Healthy self-esteem is internal. It’s the quiet confidence that comes from knowing your worth—even when no one’s watching. It shows up in the way you speak to yourself, how you care for your body, and how you protect your peace.
Performative confidence, on the other hand, often depends on external validation. It might look the same on the outside—smiling selfies, “glow-up” videos, outfit-of-the-day reels—but it’s driven by likes, views, and approval. You’re not just living your life—you’re performing it for an audience.
That’s not to say main character energy is all bad. In fact, when used mindfully, it can be a powerful tool for self-affirmation.
It encourages people to romanticize their lives, take up space, and find joy in the little things. When it comes from a place of self-love, it can actually help build real confidence.
Some signs it’s supporting your mental well-being include:
- You’re practicing better self-care—and not just for the camera.
- Your inner voice is more encouraging, not critical.
- You’re learning to say no to what drains you and yes to what matters.
If that’s the energy you’re bringing, then go ahead—romanticize that walk, post that video, celebrate yourself. Just make sure it’s for you, not for someone else’s approval.
Want more on mental wellness and identity? Explore our Blog Page for insights.
When Confidence Crosses into Narcissism
We love a good glow-up, a self-love anthem, or a “get ready with me” vlog. But here’s the tricky part—where does healthy confidence end and narcissism begin?
The line between self-celebration and self-obsession can get pretty thin, especially in a world where everything is recorded, filtered, and uploaded for others to see. What starts as a fun way to express yourself can slowly morph into a habit of constantly seeking attention, approval, or admiration.
When every moment becomes content, it’s easy to fall into a loop of “Look at me” instead of “I feel good as I am.”
Mental health professionals warn that chronic self-documentation can feed traits like:
- An inflated sense of self-importance
- A constant need for validation
- Comparing yourself to others and competing for attention
These behaviors aren’t always intentional—but social media rewards them. The more dramatic, curated, or “perfect” your life appears, the more engagement you get. It’s a cycle that can quietly erode self-worth, especially for young people still figuring out who they are.
In fact, Gen Z is feeling this pressure more than any other generation. With their lives unfolding on-screen, the boundary between authenticity and performance is constantly challenged—and it’s taking a toll on their mental health.
Read more about this in our blog on The Gen Z Mental Health Crisis
The Role of Escapism and Mental Health
Let’s be honest—sometimes, channeling “main character energy” isn’t about confidence at all. Sometimes, it’s about escape.
For many people, especially those dealing with anxiety, loneliness, or even past trauma, pretending your life is a movie can feel safer than facing what’s really going on. Turning ordinary moments into mini-movies gives us a sense of control, beauty, and purpose—especially when life behind the scenes feels heavy or messy.
But here’s the catch: when we start curating our lives as highlight reels, we might actually begin to feel more disconnected from reality—not less.
The more polished our online story becomes, the harder it gets to feel okay with the unfiltered moments. And that gap between what we post and how we actually feel? That’s where imposter syndrome creeps in.
You might start asking yourself:
- “Why doesn’t my life feel as good as it looks?”
- “If I’m the main character, why am I so exhausted all the time?”
- “What if I stop performing—will anyone still care?”
Studies have shown that excessive social media use is linked to heightened symptoms of depression, anxiety, and poor sleep quality. We’re constantly comparing our behind-the-scenes to someone else’s highlight reel—and it’s quietly affecting how we view ourselves.
If you’re struggling to unplug or unwind, read our blog on Why Your Phone Is Ruining Your Sleep—and How to Stop It. A healthier screen-life balance might be the first step to feeling like yourself again.
Reclaiming Your Narrative in a Healthy Way
You can be the main character—without making your entire life a performance.
When used intentionally, “main character energy” can be a beautiful reminder to romanticize your life, take pride in your story, and treat yourself with the care you deserve. The key is making sure that the narrative is built on truth, not just aesthetics.
Here are a few ways to do it in a healthy, grounded way:
- Practice offline mindfulness. You don’t need a filter to appreciate a quiet moment. Leave your phone behind and actually feel the sun on your face or the breeze on your skin.
- Journal your story—just for you. Not every moment needs an audience. Writing privately can help you stay honest and connected with your real emotions.
- Celebrate effort, not perfection. Shift your focus from how life looks to how it feels. Self-worth grows through trying, learning, and growing—not likes and comments.
- Show yourself grace. You’re not a polished character in a movie. You’re a human being with highs and lows—and that’s where beauty really is.
Main character energy should feel empowering, not exhausting. If it’s starting to feel like a performance you can’t keep up with, it might be time to check in with yourself.
When to Seek Support
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, drained, or like you’re losing touch with who you really are behind the screen—it’s okay to ask for help.
Some signs it may be time to speak to a mental health professional:
- You feel anxious or panicked when you’re not online
- You’re constantly comparing yourself to others
- You feel burned out from trying to “keep up”
- Your self-worth feels tied to attention or approval
- You don’t feel like yourself anymore
You deserve support that helps you feel seen—not just scrolled past.
Talking to a therapist or psychiatrist can help. Book an appointment with PsychPlus to start your journey back to you.
You’re More Than a Trend
At the end of the day, embracing your story is a powerful thing. There’s something beautiful about seeing yourself as someone worth rooting for. But remember—your worth isn’t based on how good your life looks online.
You don’t need aesthetic coffee shots, perfect lighting, or curated captions to be valuable. The real main character energy is choosing to show up for yourself—even when no one’s watching. Especially then.
So be the star of your own story—not for the views, but for your healing. Set boundaries. Ask for help when you need it. Find meaning in the quiet moments. Because growth, healing, and self-love? They’re not always flashy—but they’re real.
Your story matters, in all its messiness and magic.
Want more support, tools, and real talk? Explore the PsychPlus Blog for conversations that go deeper than the trends.
